Dear Reader,
I am looking for ideas regarding what to put on these websites that Classical Cohors runs! What kind of stuff would you like to read about? Any upcoming news? Announcements? Please offer your feedback to the oracle in the comment section, and the auspices will smile upon you.
~Apollo
Friday, October 1, 2010
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
Dear Hermes...
Apollo,
When am I going to get that great college teaching job. Do I have to wait a few months or year until the economy and state budget improves?
Should I start a new temporary or permanent career?
Searcher
Searcher,
Apollo couldn't make it in today to answer your question. Mysteriously his cattle were stolen and he's trying to retrieve them. Why bother with teaching when you could do something where you can travel? Why not be a bard? Sing, play, dance! Or maybe go into hotel management or something cool like that. If you're set on being a professor then wait it out, but try to go into a niche that has to do with writing, or maybe teach a language (like Greek!). You can't help what you love.
When am I going to get that great college teaching job. Do I have to wait a few months or year until the economy and state budget improves?
Should I start a new temporary or permanent career?
Searcher
Searcher,
Apollo couldn't make it in today to answer your question. Mysteriously his cattle were stolen and he's trying to retrieve them. Why bother with teaching when you could do something where you can travel? Why not be a bard? Sing, play, dance! Or maybe go into hotel management or something cool like that. If you're set on being a professor then wait it out, but try to go into a niche that has to do with writing, or maybe teach a language (like Greek!). You can't help what you love.
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Dear Theseus...
I'm the youngest kid in my family and I'm considered the disappointment. How can I make my dad proud of me?
Befuddled Brother
Dear Brother,
It's pretty simple. You gotta set your sights on something seemingly unobtainable. Then daddy's like "oh son, nobody can do that". And then you go and do it and BAM! Daddy is shell-shocked, the rest of the town is like "omfg your son just did that? I thought he was stupid or something" And you'll sail triumphantly home to his waiting arms and the forgiveness he will surely throw at your feet.
Just, uh, make sure you remember to do everything you told him you'd do if you came back victorious. I forgot the change the sails on my ship and...well, it's not called the Aegean sea for nothin'.
Befuddled Brother
Dear Brother,
It's pretty simple. You gotta set your sights on something seemingly unobtainable. Then daddy's like "oh son, nobody can do that". And then you go and do it and BAM! Daddy is shell-shocked, the rest of the town is like "omfg your son just did that? I thought he was stupid or something" And you'll sail triumphantly home to his waiting arms and the forgiveness he will surely throw at your feet.
Just, uh, make sure you remember to do everything you told him you'd do if you came back victorious. I forgot the change the sails on my ship and...well, it's not called the Aegean sea for nothin'.
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Dear ANYONE...
HELP! HELP ME PLEASE! I'M NOT SURE I'LL MAKE IT OUT ALIVE---
Dear Worrywart,
The gods are currently celebrating the holidays in their honor. Please leave a message and they'll get back to you when they return. Thank you and have a nice day!
Dear Worrywart,
The gods are currently celebrating the holidays in their honor. Please leave a message and they'll get back to you when they return. Thank you and have a nice day!
Friday, November 13, 2009
Dear Pan...
My girlfriend is great, but sometimes we run out of things to talk about or activities to do together. Do you have any ideas?
Curious with Care
Carebear,
Is she hot? Actually don't answer that, it isn't important. Here's what you've gotta do. I'll take her out for a day and make her realize who you are and how awesome you are. I'll even teach her a few tricks to make her more interesting! You'll have quite a few more talking points when I'm done with her.
Curious with Care
Carebear,
Is she hot? Actually don't answer that, it isn't important. Here's what you've gotta do. I'll take her out for a day and make her realize who you are and how awesome you are. I'll even teach her a few tricks to make her more interesting! You'll have quite a few more talking points when I'm done with her.
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Dear Hades...
I'm having trouble trying to get this girl to like me, do you have any tips and tricks you could share?
-Astute Student
Student,
Do you know who I am? Do you know what I do? What could you possibly expect me to know? I sit down here all day long watching over Sisyphos to make sure he doesn't try to escape (again), and Achilles just sits here whining about his glory over and over. Don't even get me started on the fact that the only glimmer of joy I get to see is with Persephone, and I don't even get to spend every day with her! Six measly months! I guess I can't really complain, there weren't any other girls around willing to see my river Styx. Not that she was willing, mind you, but Zeus is a good brother and hooked me up. Yeah, good brother. Sometimes. I just don't see why he got the land, and Poseidon got the sea, and I got Tartarus! You want my advice? Don't settle for less than what you deserve. Hmph.
-Astute Student
Student,
Do you know who I am? Do you know what I do? What could you possibly expect me to know? I sit down here all day long watching over Sisyphos to make sure he doesn't try to escape (again), and Achilles just sits here whining about his glory over and over. Don't even get me started on the fact that the only glimmer of joy I get to see is with Persephone, and I don't even get to spend every day with her! Six measly months! I guess I can't really complain, there weren't any other girls around willing to see my river Styx. Not that she was willing, mind you, but Zeus is a good brother and hooked me up. Yeah, good brother. Sometimes. I just don't see why he got the land, and Poseidon got the sea, and I got Tartarus! You want my advice? Don't settle for less than what you deserve. Hmph.
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Dear Heracles...
I can't STAND my husband. I was forced into marrying him and we are nothing alike! He doesn't make me happy, and I am slipping deeper into depression every day. Our society doesn't look too kindly on the idea of leaving him, is there any other way out?
Lassoed Lassie
Listen here, Lassie-
I'm gonna keep this short and sweet. Real simple trick: Kill 'em. Face the facts, you're absolutely right about our society, and if you don't get out in this way, you'll never get out with a second chance. This is how I see it--You knock off the hubby, plead temporary insanity, and get stuck doing some community service. Once all of that is said and done you're sailin' on smooth waves once again. This is the way to get things done! But choose your insanity plea carefully, they won't take too many as excuses before locking you up for good.
Lassoed Lassie
Listen here, Lassie-
I'm gonna keep this short and sweet. Real simple trick: Kill 'em. Face the facts, you're absolutely right about our society, and if you don't get out in this way, you'll never get out with a second chance. This is how I see it--You knock off the hubby, plead temporary insanity, and get stuck doing some community service. Once all of that is said and done you're sailin' on smooth waves once again. This is the way to get things done! But choose your insanity plea carefully, they won't take too many as excuses before locking you up for good.
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